Havoc (OC) (
wastelandking) wrote in
theattic2015-11-15 02:53 pm
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Entry tags:
PSL: That's A Real Lemon You Got There

THAT AINT THE ONLY THING THAT'S BIG
that's not true but hey you knows how it is
THREAD LOG:
#1 Customer
Super Kawaii Tape Chan
The Massage
.
no subject
"Face it, kid, it's your only option. It'd cost you less to buy a new car than to--"
Woah, where did the kid--the actual kid--come from??? Havoc looked up and pushed his hat back to spot the girl. What the hell was this guy thinking driving this rattletrap around with a kid inside?
"I can't let you drive this thing off in good faith. Look, come with me, you can use the phone and call a tow truck. The dump might give you...I dunno. Forty bucks for it. What's scrap going for these days?"
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Eyes widening, he shook his head, holding up a finger. Shooting a glance at Laura, he lowered his voice.
"Nnnno, no, no, I can't-- we can't afford a tow truck. A-and we need this car--"
"I can hear you, James! What's goin' on?!"
A hearty wince.
"--we can't... we can't not have a car, we-- look, I-- I'll put the light in myself, you don't have to do a thing!"
He's not even addressing the bumper.
He has no idea what to do about the bumper.
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The light from the door being on shone into the back seats. And that was...a mess. James was a mess. The only person here who wasn't a mess was the girl.
The devil found himself wishing he had another smaller devil on his shoulder to tell him that he was being a SUCKER and that this wasn't his problem. He massaged the soft spots under his eyes. He would try one more time. He couldn't let this coffin with wheels take off back into the streets.
"Look, you look like nice people. I can spot you some bus money home..."
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His eyes had taken on a weird, glazed look-- like a rabbit caught in the beam of a flashlight.
He could refuse the money and try to drive away-- bus money wouldn't fix the fact that he could NOT afford towing services and still have enough to put them up for a night. Hotels weren't something they could do all the time anymore, but on cold, damp evenings like this, he couldn't have Laura sleeping out in a car. And hell, they wouldn't even have a car to sleep in if they had it towed.
Or-- and part of James hated himself for even thinking of this-- he could fake a phonecall, take the money, and wait for a chance to screech right out of the lot, bumper or no bumper, tail-light or no tail-light. Then they'd have a place to sleep, and a few extra bucks.
But James could fake a phonecall about as well as he could fake being a supermodel.
"... I-I'm sorry, we need to go now."
He reached out to grab the doorhandle.
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He had been smelling some kind of non-verbal lie this whole time and the way the poor human's eyes just glazed over tied a shiny red ribbon around Havoc's suspicions. And he would have let this weird gangling jackrabbit of a man hop away into the night if it weren't for the girl.
The man in yellow put a firm hand on James's shoulder and seemed to loom even though he was a good foot and some shorter.
"Step into my office. I've got a deal for you."
He dug his fingers into James's bony shoulder and did not look like a man who liked to be told 'no'.
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He could have wrestled out of it-- maybe. He was a big guy. But his hand froze on its way to the handle, and there was genuine intimidation in his eyes when they flicked back over to Havoc's.
"... L-laura, stay in the car," he finally managed, shakily.
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The inside of the place was yellow and Havoc was quick to take his hat off and shake the mist off of it against his knee.
"I dunno if some higher power is makin' me do this or if it's early-onset dementia, but gonna spare you the fancy words and get right to the point. I can't let you drive that thing with the pipsqueak riding shotgun. It's not gonna happen."
He sat down in his battered, creaky chair and puffed out a sigh before thatching his fingers over his belly. "If your ass gets behind the wheel again, I'm calling the police."
Havoc was good and quiet for a long minute and let that sink into this guy's tossled head. Jeez, now that he was in the light, he looked even worse. It sent a pang through the spot where his heart used to be.
"The deal is, I can get you a car. A good car. Obviously." He gestured to the windows around them even though most of the blinds were done. "Don't believe everything you see in the cartoons. Anyway, I've been needing some help around here. We'll make it a trade. Manhours for horsepower. How's that sound?"
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And once they were inside, he stared at the floor and REMAINED silent. He swallowed, hard, at the word 'police'-- and his hands curled to trembling fists at his sides. But he didn't move.
"... I'm not exactly in a position to say no," he finally said. His tone was weak.
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That went over easier than he expected. He rocked forward in the chair and held out a hand. "Welcome aboard! Name's Havoctus Dynamite. You can just call me Boss."He punctuated himself with a satisfied grin. "What should I put on your nametag?"
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How on earth was he going to explain this to Laura?
And-- still-- where were they going to stay?
Reaching out reluctantly, he accepted the handshake. James's handshake was the opposite of good and firm. He shook hands like a weenie.
"Um... James. James Sunderland."
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"Sundaland! I like it!" He hopped out of the chair again and put his hat back on. "Once the weather clears up, I'll show you around, but for now let's get you two settled."
Out into the mist again, Havoc led him. He paused only long enough to shoot a significant look at the car. James was presented with an RV that had seen better days. A FOR SALE sign hung in the window.
"Here we are! This'll be your quwardas. Try not to mess up the seats, alright? Cost me a fortune to get it up and running again."
He fumbled a huge keyring out of his deep pockets and flipped through them until he found the right one. He jimmied it loose and held it out to James.
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Which meant the whirlwind that was his literal deal with the devil left him blinking like someone who wandered into daylight after sitting through a Lord of the Rings marathon and no longer knew what year it was.
By the time he ceased being stupefied, Havoc was already on his way out the door. James blinked a few more times, then stumbled out into the drizzle after him.
"Uh-- wh... wait! Don't you-- don't you need me to... I don't know, sign anything? And-- ... and I could be a criminal, aren't you... is there a background check?"
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"I'm not worried."
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For a second he seemed petrified.
Then he whispered something that sounded like "All right."
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Probably not the kind of paperwork James is imagining.
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His knees felt wobbly.
Was this really happening? It kind of felt like a dream.
"I... I'll tell Laura that we'll... be... staying, for awhile."
Was he talking to Havoc or himself at this point? Even he didn't really know.
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"Just till you can afford a car that isn't a deathtrap! Then I want you outta my hair." Then he left James there with the heavy key in his hand. He just knew he was gonna regret this when he woke up in the morning and realized that this wasn't some fever dream from eating at Mami Taco's again.