"Yeeeeeeah. A little bit," Maurice admitted. Oh, well, they'd get this sorted eventually. He felt he'd miss the big critter once they'd sent him on his way. When Envy takes the fry, Maurice bursts into giddy laughter. "Check this horse, man! He knows what's good!"
And no sooner had those words left his mouth did Envy shove his nose right into the bag.
The vampire stares at this with steadily widening eyes. Neither of his mom's horses did that! This horse was metal as fuck.
Heather's first instinct is to grab the bag and yank it away, but man Envy's really got his face in there good, and the paper tears almost immediately, scattering wrapped burgers and a small waterfall of fries all over the asphalt.
Still with her own bitten-into burger in the other hand, Heather just kind of... stares at the remains of the one Envy managed to tear into. That's. Definitely not what she would expect a horse to do.
Slowly, she leans down to one-handedly unwrap another burger, and then holds it out to the scrawny horse experimentally.
Envy doesn't pay the other two any attention, he is entirely too focused on how fucking delicious this burger is. It only takes him a few bites to polish it off, along with another mouthful of the fries that spilled all over the ground.
He hears that wrapper crinkling though, and his ears swivel right towards it before his head follows. He can't even really be bothered that this is...the opposite of normal horse behavior. He's so hungry and this is so good.
He stretches his neck right out to take a bite out of the offered burger. HELL YES.
Maurice blinks rapidly as the scene unfolds in front of him. Slowly the corners of his mouth creep upwards until he's beaming a steak-knife grin. He starts to laugh again.
"Wo-hoah! Heather! Heather, check out this horse!" He squatted down and scooped up a handful of fries, patting them into a neat bundle before holding them out for Envy the way he used to feed his parents' horses clumps of hay through the fence. "Here, boy! Shit. We gotta--we gotta name this dude Hannibal or something! Look at 'em go!"
She lets the very hungry horse have the rest of it out of her hand and immediately reaches for another. Before Envy knows it, he's got TWO people offering him big handfuls of food.
"Do you still have your phone out? Take some pictures!"
Once Envy had taken the fistful of fries, Maurice wiped his hands off on his jeans and fumbled his phone out to snap a few pictures of the obsidian grazing entity that they'd literally dragged from the gutters.
Heather's already unwrapping a third burger, all hunger forgotten in the face of this new discovery. This hamburger-eating horse is too exciting, satiating their own monstrous appetites can wait.
Maurice backed up several paces so that the two of them were backlit by the street lights.
"Got it! Oh....oh, hey, Meranda's awake. She texted me back." He thumbed over to the app to read it. "She says not to bring it home. She can't tell me what to do."
Technically she was his landlord so she could but. Still.
Envy is having the best time he's had in a long time, just devouring everything that's put even remotely close to his face. Not only is the food delicious, but he's getting it handed to him! No effort required at all!
He's just whickering happily to himself as he chews on the latest mouthful, and except for flicking his ears at Heather when she stands next to him for the picture, he doesn't even mind. He does turn his head to nose at her hands to ask for more, though. His nose is...weirdly wet and slightly sticky, but that's an automatic response to the idea of eating. No way is he going to try and drag either of these two off now.
"Well, she might have a point. Where would you guys even keep a horse?"
She responds to the nosing by automatically reaching for another burger (they're running low at this point, it's the second-to-last one) and starting to unwrap it even as she looks over at Maurice.
"I mean, you could tie him up in the yard I guess, but that freaky rooster of yours would probably come out and peck his ankles open. ... Do horses even have ankles? ... You know what I mean."
The wet stickiness of Envy's nose goes un-noted. For all her weird hangups, Heather hasn't ever really had much interaction with real bona fide horses before. Maybe their noses are SUPPOSED to be wet.
"Bloodspur's is my good baby boy! He'd leave 'em alone if I told 'em to." Maurice retorted with a huff and reached out to pat Envy's neck again. "I don't need a horse, I just wanna give Meranda a hard time. She started leavin' those passive-agressive stickynotes on the milk carton again."
Maurice crouched down so that he could be closer to the horse's head. "You wanna live at our house, buddy? Huh? You could have Meranda's room and she can live in the carport with Bloodspur!"
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And no sooner had those words left his mouth did Envy shove his nose right into the bag.
The vampire stares at this with steadily widening eyes. Neither of his mom's horses did that! This horse was metal as fuck.
"DUDE!"
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Heather's first instinct is to grab the bag and yank it away, but man Envy's really got his face in there good, and the paper tears almost immediately, scattering wrapped burgers and a small waterfall of fries all over the asphalt.
Still with her own bitten-into burger in the other hand, Heather just kind of... stares at the remains of the one Envy managed to tear into. That's. Definitely not what she would expect a horse to do.
Slowly, she leans down to one-handedly unwrap another burger, and then holds it out to the scrawny horse experimentally.
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He hears that wrapper crinkling though, and his ears swivel right towards it before his head follows. He can't even really be bothered that this is...the opposite of normal horse behavior. He's so hungry and this is so good.
He stretches his neck right out to take a bite out of the offered burger. HELL YES.
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"Wo-hoah! Heather! Heather, check out this horse!" He squatted down and scooped up a handful of fries, patting them into a neat bundle before holding them out for Envy the way he used to feed his parents' horses clumps of hay through the fence. "Here, boy! Shit. We gotta--we gotta name this dude Hannibal or something! Look at 'em go!"
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She lets the very hungry horse have the rest of it out of her hand and immediately reaches for another. Before Envy knows it, he's got TWO people offering him big handfuls of food.
"Do you still have your phone out? Take some pictures!"
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Once Envy had taken the fistful of fries, Maurice wiped his hands off on his jeans and fumbled his phone out to snap a few pictures of the obsidian grazing entity that they'd literally dragged from the gutters.
"I'm sending one to Meranda!"
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"Get a picture with me in it!"
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Maurice backed up several paces so that the two of them were backlit by the street lights.
"Got it! Oh....oh, hey, Meranda's awake. She texted me back." He thumbed over to the app to read it. "She says not to bring it home. She can't tell me what to do."
Technically she was his landlord so she could but. Still.
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He's just whickering happily to himself as he chews on the latest mouthful, and except for flicking his ears at Heather when she stands next to him for the picture, he doesn't even mind. He does turn his head to nose at her hands to ask for more, though. His nose is...weirdly wet and slightly sticky, but that's an automatic response to the idea of eating. No way is he going to try and drag either of these two off now.
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She responds to the nosing by automatically reaching for another burger (they're running low at this point, it's the second-to-last one) and starting to unwrap it even as she looks over at Maurice.
"I mean, you could tie him up in the yard I guess, but that freaky rooster of yours would probably come out and peck his ankles open. ... Do horses even have ankles? ... You know what I mean."
The wet stickiness of Envy's nose goes un-noted. For all her weird hangups, Heather hasn't ever really had much interaction with real bona fide horses before. Maybe their noses are SUPPOSED to be wet.
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Maurice crouched down so that he could be closer to the horse's head. "You wanna live at our house, buddy? Huh? You could have Meranda's room and she can live in the carport with Bloodspur!"