The vampire's brows knitted. He huffed and sighed and shifted his weight from one boot to the other, even started to walk away, but his conscience dragged him back.
And so Maurice followed the twelve-year-old into what could be a very deadly situation. He had found Dipper by calling out and it had turned okay. Maybe...they should yell and see if anyone was hurt by the tree?
Then he thought about what Dipper had told him about the woods. And the fact that the kid was out monster hunting. And the fact that he himself was also a monster. Yelling probably wasn't the best idea. Instead, he used his night vision to squint ahead as they walked. He didn't see any waving arms. He didn't see any holes either.
"Watch yer step." There were plenty of roots though and the last thing either of them needed was a broken nose.
A large shape that could easily be mistaken for a row of shrubs shifted up ahead. Wood creaked. A great, dark snout lifted into the air and sniffed two deep sniffs.
It doesn't help that Dipper has grown accustomed to this sort of thing by now. Before he would have been just fine with taking the safe route and going back home, but now his curiosity is getting the better of him.
"Hey, you can probably see pretty well in the dark, right? Let me know if you see anythi-"
He froze mid sentence as the shape caught his eye, causing him to stop dead in his tracks with Maurice still at his side. ...Or, at least he hoped he was still there.
"Hu-wha?" He'd been busy watching the ground. Then he heard it! The heavy breathing, the rustling, the--rustling that was a WHOLE HELL OF A LOT CLOSER.
There was more rustling and before they had a chance to speak or take another step, something tumbled off the high stone it had been perching on and out of the bushes. It landed not two feet away and landed in a patch of moonlight and shook the leaves from its ears before turning to blink at them curiously.
It was a baby brown bear with curious snowy spots on its back.
The vampire let out the breath he didn't know he'd sucked in and let his arms hang limp. "Oh...hah. Geez."
The bear sneezed at them once and dared to pad up to Dipper's sneaker and give it a sniff. Was he where all the delicious smells were coming from?
"He's awful small..."
Maurice watched with that sort of half-scared half-enchanted face people feed buffalo slices of toast through cracked car windows at parks do. He had never seen a young bear this close before. And there was a reason.
That reason rose up out of the bushes and towered twelve feet above them and sported an impressive sixteen point rack. It surveyed the area and then spotted its baby. And them.
Maurice's red eyes grew to the size of saucers. The hell was that thing? A deer? A bear?
"BEER!" He grabbed Dipper without giving one single thought to the kid's personal bubble and took off in the opposite direction.
If their bumbling presence hadn't caused the beast's prey drive to spike, Maurice's bolting sure did. The little bear cub blinked cluelessly after them as its mother charged by like an angry truck.
Dipper barely had time to exclaim when he found himself suddenly swept off of his feet, carried off in Maurice's arms before he could do anything. He could only hang on and make sure his hat didn't fall off as Maurice ran in the opposite direction, giving him a clear view of the be-...beer's angrily flashing eyes and snapping jaws...and horrible, jagged antlers.
"I AM I AM!" Maurice hollered as he ran in a blind panic. He wasn't used to running from monsters. He was the monster! The beer's footfalls crashed through the undergrowth behind them and he could hear its loud heaving breaths. Bears were terrifying on their own, but when you combine that with the fence-clearing bound of a deer, nobody has a good time.
They were both lucky that Maurice had fed only hours ago and had supernatural stamina to spare.
What he did not have was supernatural smarts.
As he ran, he looked everywhere but down. Murphy's law snapped into full force as the earth fell away from beneath Maruice's boots and the two of them tumbled right back into the pit he had found Dipper in to begin with.
Dipper felt a scream leave him involuntarily as they both pitched forward into the pit, straight back into the darkness. Thankfully, Dipper never has been much of a heavy kid so when he inevitably landed on top of Maurice he didn't make much of an impact, but it was enough to knock the wind out of his lungs.
But that also meant they were now at the mercy of the beer...which he hoped would either miss the pit entirely, not be able to fit, or be competent enough to know that if it went after them it wouldn't be able to so easily climb back out again.
"Uoof!" Indeed, a tween landing on his chest did send the air rushing out of him. He cringed and coughed and squinted upward into the dim circle of light. The footfalls grew closer and in only moments a horrible face eclipsed their portal to freedom. It let out a low rumble and moved to snap at them but its antlers were too broad.
The beer grunted angrily and turned its head one way and then the other but there was no way it could reach them with its jaws.
So it tried its paws instead. Momma Beer drew back and reached down into the pit with a long furry arm tipped in wicked sickles. One snagged Dipper's hat.
"H-hey!" Dipper exclaimed, though really he knew he should be less concerned about that and more concerned about whether or not he'd make it back to the Shack in one piece. He had enough sense to stay down though as the beer swiped her massive paw at them, just narrowly missing the top of his head.
Maurice managed to get his breath back in time to wheeze it out again. He tried to make himself as flat as possible so that Dipper could keep his head.
Dipper could only nod in agreement, even though he knew the beer wouldn't understand. The baby was still around he hoped, so maybe it would wander in her line of sight to reassure her that they hadn't actually harmed it.
Momma Beer dragged the hat up to the surface but it was hard to tell what became of it. Bits of dirt and small stones and drool rained down on them as the creature tried its best to grab at the meat at the bottom of the hole.
Maurice's mind slowed down as the growling and scraping continued. They weren't going anywhere...so they beer need to go somewhere. The dead man's brows dipped downward and a sharp frown cut itself into his face.
"I've had just about enough of this crap." He grunted and leaned up, turning to the side to dump Dipper onto the dirt. Then he turned his face skyward and let out an impressive roar of his own.
With Dipper's encouragement, Maurice felt less like he was a crazy yelling guy in a hole and more like a guy in a hole who was doing some good.
"RROOOOAAAAAAR!" he bellowed back.
The beer blinked furiously. Then she planted her paws on either side of the hole, sucked in a deep breath of her own, and let loose a thundercrash of a roar right in Maurice's face.
Maurice coughed and crumpled up like a dying spider. "She spit in my mouth! I'm going to get rabies and die!"
Dipper clamped both hands over his ears and fell back against the side of the hole as the beer roared back, glancing over at Maurice out of the corner of his eye.
"...Maurice, you're already dead! You're a vampire!"
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wolfintheattic) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
theattic2014-11-09 07:23 pm
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"I saw some college kids partying but...I don't think it was a wild enough party to cause that."
He tried to imagine what could possibly be big enough to push over a tree. Maybe it was just a bear...and a really old rotting tree. Maybe. Maybe.
"This is the part where we leave and find civilization again, right?"
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"...you don't think maybe we should check it out, do you? Just to make sure nobody got caught up in that."
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"Kid, you nearly died in a hole, I think you've met your adventure quota for today."
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"...Well yeah, but you came and found me. Someone else could be in the same boat right now."
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"Fine, we'll look. But only a quick look!"
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"It's probably nothing...but it's better to make sure anyway. Just in case."
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Then he thought about what Dipper had told him about the woods. And the fact that the kid was out monster hunting. And the fact that he himself was also a monster. Yelling probably wasn't the best idea. Instead, he used his night vision to squint ahead as they walked. He didn't see any waving arms. He didn't see any holes either.
"Watch yer step." There were plenty of roots though and the last thing either of them needed was a broken nose.
A large shape that could easily be mistaken for a row of shrubs shifted up ahead. Wood creaked. A great, dark snout lifted into the air and sniffed two deep sniffs.
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"Hey, you can probably see pretty well in the dark, right? Let me know if you see anythi-"
He froze mid sentence as the shape caught his eye, causing him to stop dead in his tracks with Maurice still at his side. ...Or, at least he hoped he was still there.
"Uuuhh....M...Maurice...?"
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There was more rustling and before they had a chance to speak or take another step, something tumbled off the high stone it had been perching on and out of the bushes. It landed not two feet away and landed in a patch of moonlight and shook the leaves from its ears before turning to blink at them curiously.
It was a baby brown bear with curious snowy spots on its back.
The vampire let out the breath he didn't know he'd sucked in and let his arms hang limp. "Oh...hah. Geez."
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"...you don't think this little guy could've made that noise, do you?"
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"He's awful small..."
Maurice watched with that sort of half-scared half-enchanted face people feed buffalo slices of toast through cracked car windows at parks do. He had never seen a young bear this close before. And there was a reason.
That reason rose up out of the bushes and towered twelve feet above them and sported an impressive sixteen point rack. It surveyed the area and then spotted its baby. And them.
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His breath caught painfully in the back of his throat as he took a shaky step back away from the bear cub, backing up to stand by Maurice again.
"....O...oookay I...I think it's...time to go home now..."
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"BEER!" He grabbed Dipper without giving one single thought to the kid's personal bubble and took off in the opposite direction.
If their bumbling presence hadn't caused the beast's prey drive to spike, Maurice's bolting sure did. The little bear cub blinked cluelessly after them as its mother charged by like an angry truck.
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Dipper barely had time to exclaim when he found himself suddenly swept off of his feet, carried off in Maurice's arms before he could do anything. He could only hang on and make sure his hat didn't fall off as Maurice ran in the opposite direction, giving him a clear view of the be-...beer's angrily flashing eyes and snapping jaws...and horrible, jagged antlers.
"AUUGH- Run! RUN!!!"
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They were both lucky that Maurice had fed only hours ago and had supernatural stamina to spare.
What he did not have was supernatural smarts.
As he ran, he looked everywhere but down. Murphy's law snapped into full force as the earth fell away from beneath Maruice's boots and the two of them tumbled right back into the pit he had found Dipper in to begin with.
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But that also meant they were now at the mercy of the beer...which he hoped would either miss the pit entirely, not be able to fit, or be competent enough to know that if it went after them it wouldn't be able to so easily climb back out again.
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The beer grunted angrily and turned its head one way and then the other but there was no way it could reach them with its jaws.
So it tried its paws instead. Momma Beer drew back and reached down into the pit with a long furry arm tipped in wicked sickles. One snagged Dipper's hat.
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"Leave us alone! We didn't touch your baby!"
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Maurice's mind slowed down as the growling and scraping continued. They weren't going anywhere...so they beer need to go somewhere. The dead man's brows dipped downward and a sharp frown cut itself into his face.
"I've had just about enough of this crap." He grunted and leaned up, turning to the side to dump Dipper onto the dirt. Then he turned his face skyward and let out an impressive roar of his own.
The beer stopped roaring and snorted in surprise.
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"Hey...k..keep doing that, Maurice! I bet you can scare her off!" Or, at least he hoped.
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"RROOOOAAAAAAR!" he bellowed back.
The beer blinked furiously. Then she planted her paws on either side of the hole, sucked in a deep breath of her own, and let loose a thundercrash of a roar right in Maurice's face.
Maurice coughed and crumpled up like a dying spider. "She spit in my mouth! I'm going to get rabies and die!"
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"...Maurice, you're already dead! You're a vampire!"
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The beer started to dig away at the edge of the hole, finally noticing that the earth was soft.
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