That was the sound a cat made when it had made a terrible decision. Spaghetti balanced her fat calico ass on the very tip top of a chain link fence that ran between the hardware store and Mike's Donuts. On either side were multiple stray dogs of varying sizes all jumping against the fence and barking. She had originally planned to lose them by darting down the alley and hopping the fence but then the family's poodles with zero behavior exposure happened to be out on their retractable leeds that day.
So she was trapped with teeth on either side. Eventually the dogs on one would be pulled back into their home but...that could take a while. Those people wouldn't get home for hours.
Heather had never had a pet, unless bagged carnival-prize feeder goldfish that died two months later counted. And she didn't count them, not really.
She doesn't have animal-in-distress noises burned into her brain like some people do.
But what she does know is the sound of dogs mobbing something-- she knows that noise intimately.
And as much as she'd really rather cover her ears and walk faster past it, she's also curious. And maybe even a little bit eager for an excuse to smack some dogs around with a 2x4.
Which is what she's holding when she rounds the corner and spots the tubby housecat teeter-tottering on the fence.
Spaghetti was squashed as flat against the fence as she could be, eyes squeezed shut. It would be over in a few hours. She was cool. She could wait twice that many hours!
But then a voice cut through the canine chaos and her yellow eyes popped open.
It was a human! A human with a BEATING STICK. She knew one of those when she saw one and her heart started pounding in her throat. Was she going to get an out? BLESS THIS TWO-LEGS.
The board whistled through the air as she continued forward, swinging it threateningly-- there were a few holes in it. But that didn't matter. Heather had a feeling that it wouldn't take much to send these normal, not-undead dogs packing.
Luckily, Heather was right. These were not undead murder dogs born from her brain to torture her. So when an angry human swinging a board came into view, the not-poodles were forced to abandon their game and run like cowards.
Heather was not the first human to threaten them and she wouldn't be the last.
Meanwhile, Spaghetti watched it all play out in slow motion. She swore she heard the board clip one of the dogs on the hip too. And what an arm that chick had! She shot a sneer over a white-furred shoulder at the two poodles who had just lost their afternoon's entertainment.
She leaped down and landed in a crouch. There was a small worry that tugged at the back of her mind--what if this girl just hated all animals? But nawwww. Who could hate Spaghetti? She was too cute and too cool for that.
Head high and little poff tail straight up, the cat trundled out of the alleyway, stopping long enough to look up at Heather and squeeze both eyes shut.
Heather swung that board like it was an extension of her own inner rage.
She wielded it like Thor's Hammer.
In slow-motion, it looked very impressive.
In real-time, it mostly just looked like a girl flailing around with a board and lots of dogs scrambling to get away. Only once the alley was completely vacated of dogs did Heather lower her weapon.
A good days' work.
When the little cat trundles past, she watches it go-- she's never really been a CAT person, but it IS a cute little thing.
Maurice was on his knees with both hands planted flat against the front of the soda machine. He and Heather were out on yet another one of their TONIGHT WE OWN THIS TOWN adventures which really didn't consist of more than pretending to break the law by jaywalking and standing around with suspicious cups. While wearing sunglasses. At night.
The vampire was feeling especially rebellious wearing his CINDER FUCKING RELLA tanktop. He did not feel very rebelious though because the soda machine had taken his last dollar and he had no Dr. Pepper to show for it.
She offers this as a reply literally without even thinking about it. She's known Maurice long enough that she knows exactly what to say to get the most indignant responses.
The jab is not, however, about his shirt, which she encouraged him to wear tonight. Because why the FUCK not?
She even went to the trouble of picking out a matching tank-top. Hers has Mulan on it, along with some of the lyrics to Be a Man. Because FUCK YOU, that's why. She tips her sunglasses down and smirks like an asshole.
"You died with that 'do and now you're doomed to never get satisfaction from the vending machines."
"I'm not even going to respond to that," grumbled Maurice. He pounded a fist against the machine again. Suddenly, the machine started to shake. He shuffled backwards on his knees and caught himself on his hands. "Oh, shit, I made it mad!"
The machine continued to shudder until suddenly it stopped and several plinking sounds came from inside. Maurice's quarters plus a few tumbled out of the coin return slot.
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Get Lucky
That was the sound a cat made when it had made a terrible decision. Spaghetti balanced her fat calico ass on the very tip top of a chain link fence that ran between the hardware store and Mike's Donuts. On either side were multiple stray dogs of varying sizes all jumping against the fence and barking. She had originally planned to lose them by darting down the alley and hopping the fence but then the family's poodles with zero behavior exposure happened to be out on their retractable leeds that day.
So she was trapped with teeth on either side. Eventually the dogs on one would be pulled back into their home but...that could take a while. Those people wouldn't get home for hours.
"Aooowwwwwwm!"
no subject
She doesn't have animal-in-distress noises burned into her brain like some people do.
But what she does know is the sound of dogs mobbing something-- she knows that noise intimately.
And as much as she'd really rather cover her ears and walk faster past it, she's also curious. And maybe even a little bit eager for an excuse to smack some dogs around with a 2x4.
Which is what she's holding when she rounds the corner and spots the tubby housecat teeter-tottering on the fence.
"HEY!"
no subject
But then a voice cut through the canine chaos and her yellow eyes popped open.
It was a human! A human with a BEATING STICK. She knew one of those when she saw one and her heart started pounding in her throat. Was she going to get an out? BLESS THIS TWO-LEGS.
no subject
"Get outta here!"
no subject
Heather was not the first human to threaten them and she wouldn't be the last.
Meanwhile, Spaghetti watched it all play out in slow motion. She swore she heard the board clip one of the dogs on the hip too. And what an arm that chick had! She shot a sneer over a white-furred shoulder at the two poodles who had just lost their afternoon's entertainment.
She leaped down and landed in a crouch. There was a small worry that tugged at the back of her mind--what if this girl just hated all animals? But nawwww. Who could hate Spaghetti? She was too cute and too cool for that.
Head high and little poff tail straight up, the cat trundled out of the alleyway, stopping long enough to look up at Heather and squeeze both eyes shut.
no subject
She wielded it like Thor's Hammer.
In slow-motion, it looked very impressive.
In real-time, it mostly just looked like a girl flailing around with a board and lots of dogs scrambling to get away. Only once the alley was completely vacated of dogs did Heather lower her weapon.
A good days' work.
When the little cat trundles past, she watches it go-- she's never really been a CAT person, but it IS a cute little thing.
"... Be careful, okay?"
SOME DAYS LATER
Maurice was on his knees with both hands planted flat against the front of the soda machine. He and Heather were out on yet another one of their TONIGHT WE OWN THIS TOWN adventures which really didn't consist of more than pretending to break the law by jaywalking and standing around with suspicious cups. While wearing sunglasses. At night.
The vampire was feeling especially rebellious wearing his CINDER FUCKING RELLA tanktop. He did not feel very rebelious though because the soda machine had taken his last dollar and he had no Dr. Pepper to show for it.
"Was I a bad person in a past life, Heather?"
no subject
She offers this as a reply literally without even thinking about it. She's known Maurice long enough that she knows exactly what to say to get the most indignant responses.
The jab is not, however, about his shirt, which she encouraged him to wear tonight. Because why the FUCK not?
She even went to the trouble of picking out a matching tank-top. Hers has Mulan on it, along with some of the lyrics to Be a Man. Because FUCK YOU, that's why. She tips her sunglasses down and smirks like an asshole.
"You died with that 'do and now you're doomed to never get satisfaction from the vending machines."
no subject
The machine continued to shudder until suddenly it stopped and several plinking sounds came from inside. Maurice's quarters plus a few tumbled out of the coin return slot.
"Oho, nice!"